So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
