you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
