I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Randomize
