guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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