i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
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