what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
