Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
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