it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
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