Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
A+ Viking dick
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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