I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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