NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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