I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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