but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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