Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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