i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize