Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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