We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Randomize
