Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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