Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Quick, to the slutcave!
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
