Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
