If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
