shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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