I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
