don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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