Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
