I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize