Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
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