is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
accomplished twins. life is a go
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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