Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
