nut hugger
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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