sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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