dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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