yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
