I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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