You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Randomize
