Where is the hickey?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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