I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
