that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
My day in three words: secret purse cake
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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