its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
