i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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