Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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