just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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