We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
