i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Sober January is a disaster.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
