This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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