Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
