erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
