With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
