Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
