Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
